Today I've been reading and marking up a couple of really interesting articles that I found by following links from Tonia's blog. One of them is a sample chapter from a new book by Adam McHugh. The book is called Introverts in Church, and the sample chapter is called "Extroverts in the Church." The premise is that Americans' admiration for extroverted behavior, especially in leadership, has spilled over into they way our churches, and especially our evangelical churches, are structured. The result is that introverts sometimes feel spiritually inferior because they can't keep up the level of involvement that others do, or because they don't like to share every detail of their thoughts.
While McHugh rightly points out that no one should use personality as an excuse for stagnation, I found the article inspiring. Renewal often comes from within the hearts of quiet and thoughtful Christians as they seek the will of God in prayer. And many Christians badly want to know that they can work for the good of the Kingdom without having to force themselves into a mold that feels not merely like a stretch, but like a round peg in a square hole. McHugh encourages introverts not to automatically disqualify themselves from leadership positions, because sometimes their steadiness and insight is just what a group needs.
I've put a link at right in the Delicious bookmarks.
If I don't post again for a while, it's just because I'm finding that my thoughts are too slow and tentative to make posts lately. I'll be back when the atmosphere becomes conducive to posting once again.
Good Advent to you!
10 comments:
Hi Laura,
I enjoyed the thoughts on introverts and their place in the church. My introverted kids noticed during their youth group days how much the teen focus in particular is directed towards the extrovert -- a very fast pace, loud music, lots of activity. It made us think that the more traditional church was more careful to have things for different types of temperaments.
Have a blessed Advent!
Interesting thoughts. I am quite sure that I am more introverted when it comes to church things, and I see it played out to some extent in my own kids. My daughter (like her mom) is not interested in women's retreats and conferences and the other ladies just don't understand that we prefer a more quiet spiritual life. Is that bad?
I may have to look this book up.
Thanks for mentioning it, Laura.
Happy Holy Advent,
Jody
From your description of the book, I think I would strongly agree with the author on the problematic situation for introverts. Nowadays I think that it is really the extroverts who are at a disadvantage if they can't enjoy what Jody calls a "quiet spiritual life." It is in a still, small voice that God speaks, and to hear it one needs some solitude, a rare commodity in the busy evangelical church life. The Bible tells us we should be slow to speak, but in many churches people are always trying to "draw out" the quiet ones.
Laura,
I'm so glad you took the time to introduce yourself on my blog. Of course, I clicked over to your blog and have enjoyed reading a number of your posts today. My, we do seem to have a lot in common: music, books, violinist daughters, homeschooling, even simplicity in scrapbooking (No Stickers! was my mantra when I began.) I'm sure I am very pleased to meet you!
~Melissa (desert mom)
Hi, Willa. Perhaps I've waited too long to reply, since you're sort of on Advent sabbatical, but I was very intrigued by your comments. I felt the same way about youth group when I was growing up, and that's one reason I don't push it on my daughter (also an introvert).
By the more traditional church, do you mean the church of a particular era? I think of almost any past time as being more family and community oriented (as in, people really know each others' children well) than today, don't you?
Jody, you make an excellent point, and I have often asked myself that same question: "Is it bad?" I don't have a final answer, but I do find that this season of quiet in my life has genuinely been one of renewal. Only time and action will tell, of course, and that's not the kind of thing you can see on the internet!
I agree with what you're saying, GretchenJoanna. Christian women do talk alot, and it *can* be helpful, but not always. I've been one of those leaders at meetings where we talk about "drawing people out," and I'm taking a second look at that sort of assumption. How do you think that extroverts are at more of a disadvantage nowadays than they were before? I'm curious!
And Melissa, if you've come back to check comments after so long, and read down this far, nice to meet you, too! (And you must be very patient.)
I never was much of a sticker person, either ;-). And after reading your "turkey one, turkey twice" post this morning, I have to say that we love that poem! In fact, I once did an entire scrapbook in which I took the lines of that Sendak book, twisted them in silly ways to fit our family goings on, printed them out in different fonts, and used them to mark the passage of seasons on the pages. I regret that I'm not quite so energetic in my scrapbooking these days, however. This year my goal is simply to get all the photos down on the pages and labelled ;-).
"Nowadays" was adverbial to "I think" and not the condition of the extroverts. Sorry, not well put....what I mean is, all of us, extroverts included, could benefit by more prayer time and less chat and party time. Introverts have a better chance of getting that, while extroverts are happy to live the typical over-busy life and neglect "going into the closet" of their hearts.
Laura,
I think you will really like the book. I was half expecting a bit of pop psychology since i haven't read anything on the spiritual aspects of introversion (IS there anything written about that?) I was so pleased to find a deep, thoughtful, wise book.
It was very liberating and helped me put to rest some old wounds and doubts about myself. I'm very grateful for it.
I totally agree about the pop psychology aspect of many Christian books, Tonia. I have almost stopped reading this sort of book because of that. They just don't satisfy deeply.
Thanks for your recommendation. I think I'll have to read the whole book eventually!
Laura,
Thanks for this link. I am just now catching up on my feeds since Thanksgiving. I think maybe that this article may address my own issues with church. Maybe it's not the 'community' issues that we have been talking about on my blog but rather this extrovert/introvert distinction. It may not seem like it from my blog but I am extremely introverted. I enjoy communicating online but there are times with something changes in an online setting and I feel like stepping way, way back. It is almost like I have too many things to deal with and I can't cope. I am wondering if that has to do with the introvert thing also.
Anyway, I find this very interesting and maybe it will help me to have some sort of peace about where I stand in the body of Christ.
Cindy, I don't know the answer, for myself or for you, but it's something I think about a lot.
And yes, I can believe you're introverted, because the things you discuss on your blog aren't just "talking out loud," but reflect a lot of previous or continuous thought. I sometimes think introverts are more likely to have blogs just for this purpose. Or at least, I think it was a factor in my own decision to start one. I wanted some kind of communication that wouldn't go away immediately, and that allowed me to think before speaking.
I met Barbara and another ClassEd lady last night at a concert where Barbara's daughter was playing, and we were talking about how one thing we had in common was your blog. So, introvert or not, you're bringing people together!
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